Marriage: an occupation for women in India

The thought is disturbing. Looking around I find that how even till date women in our country consider marriage to be an occupation i.e. something which would facilitate their living throughout. The manner in which a man seeks a job for himself, women at large yearn for a man who is making a decent amount of money and can take care of their expenses and in exchange they are ready to offer their husbands services like laundry, cooking, cleaning of the house, sex etc. Women view marriage as a respectable job that they wish to do all their life. Women believe that their domain is the house and of the man is the world outside. They take great pride in being ‘homemakers’.

The division of labour and oppression of women has been a common phenomenon in India. But surprisingly even in the current times when constant attempts are being made to eliminate such evils from our society, a large part of the women folk deliberately assent to a life of subjugation for themselves. Most of such females have been tutored by their parents to blindly obey the commands of their husbands and keep the other people in his family happy, even if that comes at the cost of one’s own happiness. There are also those women who consider themselves fortunate in spending the money of their husbands and are of the notion that females of a family work only in case of a lack of assets. Such women enjoy partying, splurging in goods that they have a penchant for etc. For them it is the best life a woman can lead.

In our country there has been a great deal of discussion on changing the outlook of men towards women but at the same time it is also essential that women should change the way they think about themselves. Women should become self-dependent before tying knots; deeming marriage to be an occupation renders it a relation between an employer and an employee where the former (i.e. the husband) has right over the workings of the latter (i.e. the wife). The relation of marriage is like a cart that runs better when its wheels are equal in size, neither outgrows the others. At the same time it is pertinent to not to undermine the achievements and strength of working women; like men, women too need to find their place under the sun and their contribution (in their respective sectors) is significant for the growth and development of a country. We need to understand that to become a sacrificing daughter in law or mother is not the mantra for the day. Today we need to be more dynamic and balancing in our approach; we can be good wives, mothers, daughters and sisters as well; all we require is some courage and confidence in our moves. Remember, the small steps we take today will take us to a brighter and better tomorrow.